scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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