IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize