It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize