Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
