Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
My bed is full of blood and feathers
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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