I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
