waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
my poor anus
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
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