Whod you bang
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize