id be glad to
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize