In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
