Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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