I smell stomach acid.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Don't tell me you're on acid again
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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