guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
