i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize