were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
