If i come over, it means nothing
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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