my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
