Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
