Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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