Will you blow on my dice?
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
