We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize