Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
