I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
