We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
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