Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
