Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
