it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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