I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
