Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize