Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Randomize
