I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
