bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
