My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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