Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize