you would pick up someone in the library
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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