We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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