i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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