You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize