But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
