I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize