I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
