ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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