her vagine was all disorganized.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
