its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize