i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
