they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
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