Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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