the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
