he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
