He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
