who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
